Dear Matthew DeKneef [former Weekly associate arts and culture editor] and everyone else who’s ever left Hawaii for Los Angeles, or San Francisco, or anywhere),
I was a mess last week when you left. The last day we spent together, on the Hawaii Five-0 set as “airport travelers” oggling LL Cool J, you probably didn’t realize that I was savoring every second we spent, hanging on your every trademark deadpan humorous word. OK, I might have been laughing a bit too hard, but it was from the heart, man. Your writing, I don’t know how you do it, but it is unlike anything else I’ve ever read. Remember that time you wrote the now-defunct Waikiki Edition is on a bottle of Quaaludes and named it the Best Place To Cry In The Afternoon? I’m STILL LAUGHING OUT LOUD at that one.
Remember all those times I would randomly text you something unintelligible? I wasn’t drunk or anything, I was really just doing it to see what you would say back, and you never disappointed. I was always so jealous of how your made-up grammar and vocabulary made it past the editors. I’m really going to miss you. It’s good there’s Internet these days (and you do still bang out the best Twitters I’ve ever read) so it will feel like you are still close. I just want to say, you will be missed dearly.
I’m not going to be selfish and scream “Don’t leave!” when I know that someone as talented as you will find much more success in the city that breeds entertainment. The sadness that washes over me whenever we lose a great talent is only brief, and always matures into a great sense of pride. There goes another one, out there to represent the greatest city in the world. Hi/Byes was definitely an unexpected difficulty to endure after settling in here, knowing that I was done: Done with travels, done with my personal and professional goals, done with all of it. My goal was to make a life here. I guess you could say I’m the opposite of you. There’s nothing more I really need or want from life besides the life I made in this amazing city. I’ll be here when you come back though, probably still frolicking around, chasing after a new crew of It Girls (and boys).
Looking at some of the summer parties that are springing up, I’m really hoping we can get some oomph in the weeklies. If this was LA, Thursday would totally be the night to go out. Blaise Sato and Flash are back together with DJs XL and Delve to give it a go at pumping up Thursday nights at Apartment3 with their Champagne Campaign. Expect occasional guests and that core group of way-too-much-fun-and-good-looking industry crowd that has already blown up Wednesdays to critical mass. Now they get two nights. It’s good for Addiction too, which has been struggling to pack their Thursday nights, with the exception of Blaise and Flashʻs ME2 party there before Easter. I don’t see why Thursday night can’t be their pro night, since the weekends there are bananas packed. If the coming weeks are anything like last week, when everyone ran there from Apartment3, expect an amazing summer.